“Look Amanda,” I said, my voice heavy with frustration. “The police are stopping the search. They said they haven’t found a trace and it’s been five days now. Plus there’s a storm coming.” Amanda looked at me, her eyes sharp with such malice and hatred that I felt a chill running down my spine.

“So you just want to stop the search now?” she spat. “I mean, it’s only our daughter. She’s out there, frightened, and you just want to stop the search?”

The words hit me like a punch in the gut. I felt tears welling up, but I managed to reply, ”Don’t even say that. Of course, I want them to keep looking. But I’m not in charge. Please honey, don’t see me as the enemy. I love you. I love Charlene.”

“Don’t you dare speak her name,” she yelled, her voice breaking. “you just see the search as an inconvenience to you. Just leave me alone.”

I didn’t argue. I turned and walked out of the bedroom, into the living room of our cabin. I sank onto the couch, my hands over my face, and cried – grieving for our daughter, and now, my estranged wife.

That night, I decided to sleep on the couch. I could hear Amanda sobbing from the other room. As much as I wanted to comfort her, I knew she needed space. The night dragged on, and I drifted in and out of a restless sleep. The storm was raging outside. Rain was pouring, and thunder and lightning were lighting up the sky. I woke up the next morning, stiff and tired from a terrible night of sleep. I decided to make breakfast – eggs and bacon – and brought it up to her.

“Here, darling. I made breakfast,” I said, trying to sound as normal as possible. She looked at me, eyes puffy and red.

“Is that all you can think of?” she snapped. “While our daughter is somewhere out there, scared and alone in this weather? And you think of breakfast?”

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Look, it won’t do her any good if we stop our lives. If we stop taking care of ourselves. You need to eat.”

She turned away, her eyes welling up. I felt a pit in my stomach, but I didn’t know how to fix this. The day went on like that – me trying to reach Amanda, and her shutting me out. Every attempt I made felt like a failure. It hurt, but I wouldn’t give up. I couldn’t go through this alone, and I knew she couldn’t either. I had to find a way to break through. I really wanted to go out and look for Charlene, but I knew it would be a suicide mission. I just hoped she had found shelter in another cabin, or a cave at least.

As the day faded into evening, I decided to make dinner. I helped Amanda to the dining room, and sat her down. I took my seat and we began eating in silence. A few bites into the meal, I glanced over at her. She was poking her fork at the meal listlessly, her gaze flicking from her plate to the window and back again. She let out a long, sad sigh. It hurt me to see her like this – not the Amanda I knew, the one who used to joke and laugh at the smallest things. But then again, I wasn’t the same either. I was falling apart inside. Still, I had to stay strong, for the both of us. We couldn’t crumble under the weight of this.

I was angry too – angry that the police and park rangers had decided that it would be too dangerous to continue. There had been heavy rain, about a week ago, and the flooding made the conditions too risky. And the storm that was raging currently definitely didn’t make it easier. All that adding up, the search would be called off for now, because to keep on going would be too dangerous. I had shouted, pleaded with them, but it was of no use. One of the rangers told me he understood, but they couldn’t risk anyone else’s life. I couldn’t believe it. How could they just give up on a four year old like that? The thought of it made my blood boil, and eventually, I couldn’t hold it anymore. I broke down, tears streaming down my face. Amanda saw me, and then, to my surprise, started crying too. I walked over to her and we hugged and cried together, as lightning illuminated the sky once more.

The next day, we sat in the dining room, staring at each other across the table. Every now and then, we’d glance out the window, but mostly we just sat in silence. We both knew how the other was feeling, and there was nothing left to say. We also knew we couldn’t go out and search for her ourselves. We didn’t know the woods well enough, and we could easily get lost. Secondly, we weren’t equipped for a long stretch in the wilderness. Our clothes wouldn’t protect us from the elements, and if we got lost, we probably wouldn’t survive for long. All in all, it was just too risky, no matter how much we wanted to find Charlene.

I tried talking to Amanda several times that day. Sometimes she’d acknowledge me, but other times she just stared out the window, or at me – or maybe even right through me. She didn’t really answer, and I didn’t really know what to say anymore. It was hard to make a conversation when everything felt so heavy. The incident with Charlene weighed on both of us, and neither of us could escape it. The day seemed to drag on, hours just passing by, each bleeding into the next. Before I knew it, it had turned dark outside.

I stood up to prepare dinner, but then I thought I heard Charlene’s voice coming from the woods. “Mommy? Daddy? I’m scared.” Then a short, muffled scream. My heart stopped. Was I hearing things? I turned to Amanda, and she looked just as stunned as I felt. Her eyes were wide, and her mouth was slightly open. Had she heard it too?

We sat there, frozen in shock, and then… we heard it again. “Mommy? Daddy? I’m scared.” Another muffled scream. But there was something wrong. Something I just couldn’t place. A nagging feeling in the back of my mind told me to be cautious. But before I could do or say anything, Amanda jumped up, shouting, “Charlene!” She didn’t even bother to put on shoes, she just ran outside.

I tried to call to her, to stop her. “Amanda, wait!” But she was gone in an instant, disappearing into the woods. I ran after her, hoping she’d come to her senses. “Amanda, please stop.”

I chased after her as she darted through the trees, my heart racing. She was just out of sight, but I could still hear her – her footsteps, the rustling of the underbrush as she pushed forward. I yelled her name again. “Amanda, stop.” But she didn’t slow down.

I caught up to a small clearing, and there she was, standing still, looking around in every direction, her breath coming in short gasps. “Honey, please,” I said, my voice shaking with frustration and fear. “We don’t know where she is. If we get lost too, we won’t be able to help her. We need to think this through.”

She turned toward me, her face twisted in fury. “Well then, go back to the cabin,” she spat. “Go back and hide, and leave our daughter out here in these woods. You don’t care about her. You don’t care about either of us.”

The force of her words hit me like a truck. The anger in her voice, the hatred in her eyes – it crushes me. I could feel the tears welling up again, but I couldn’t speak. I covered my face with my hands and let out a sob, the pain of her words mixed with the weight of everything we were going through.

“Don’t even say that, honey,” I managed to choke out. “You and Charlene are my world. My everything.” I pulled my hands away from my face, and I realized – she was gone.

“Amanda!” I screamed, panic rising in my chest. “Amanda, honey!” My voice cracked as I called her name again, more urgently this time. I could hear something rustling behind me. Without thinking, I sprinted toward the sound, calling out her name with every step.

It was hard to navigate the woods in the dark. I called out for Amanda, then tried to listen for any sounds – anything that might give me a clue as to where she was. After a few minutes, I heard something behind me. “Mommy? Daddy? I’m scared.” But it wasn’t Charlene’s voice. It sounded like several voices, all at once. A cold chill ran down my spine. What in the world could that be?

Then, to my left, I heard Amanda’s voice. “Oh, honey, I’ve missed you so much. Come to mommy.” Her voice was sweet, but was followed by a blood-curdling scream that made my stomach drop. “Amanda!” I yelled, as I ran towards the sound.

Branches whipped past me as I pushed through the thick forest, trying to reach her. What is going on in these woods? I thought to myself, as my mind was racing. I was almost there, when I tripped over something – hard. I fell to the ground, my forehead hitting the earth with a sharp thud. Stars exploded behind my eyes, and for a moment I just lay there, dazed.

When my vision cleared, I realized I had tripped over the the leg of a person. A person wearing what looked like Amanda’s clothes – ripped in places, stained with blood. “Oh, god, honey!” I screamed as I recognized the remains of my beloved wife. It most definitely was Amanda – or what was left of her. Her torso had been cut open, from her neck to her hip. Most of her insides were gone. And her face… her beautiful face. The eyes were gone, her mouth frozen in a silent scream.

I held her, crying, screaming her name, but it felt like the last piece of my heart had been torn away. The pain was unbearable. And then… I heard it again. The rustling of leaves. Behind me. And Amanda’s voice, saying, “Oh honey, I’ve missed you so much. Come to mommy.”